WHAT YOU’LL LEARN

• Understanding Pain Management from a Psychological Lens
• Myths About Kids and Pain Management
• How the Medical Community Views Pain in Women, Kids, and Minorities
• How to Make Vaccinations Less Traumatic for Kids
• Pain Management Options During Vaccinations

As a mom, it can be so hard to watch our children endure pain and fear during medical procedures. Even routine vaccinations can trigger extreme fear in some children, leaving us wondering how to keep our children safe without causing trauma. 

We do our best to support our children through their fears and anxieties. But most of us don’t even know that there are pain management options available—ways to make needles and shots hurt less for our children who are terrified. 

The medical community isn’t always trained on pain management for kids—and we might not know where to begin with advocating for it. 

This week on The Momwell Podcast, I’m joined by Dr. Jody Thomas, founder of Meg Foundation, to discuss needle phobia, medical trauma and anxiety, and how to support our kids and advocate for pain management during shots and other procedures. 

Understanding Pain Management from a Psychological Lens

After an experience with her own daughter in the NICU that opened her eyes to the way doctors overlook pain management options for young children, Dr. Jody created Meg Foundation to transform the way that the world thinks about pain—especially when it comes to kids. 

We often think of pain as a simple physical reaction to something. But Dr. Jody pointed out that it’s so much more. She said that every bit of research for the last 40 years confirms that pain is a biological, psychological, and social experience.

We’ve all had experiences where a stubbed toe hurts so much worse when we’re in a bad mood or dealing with stress, just as we’ve all discovered bruises and wondered where they even came from. Our psychological state and well-being directly impact our ability to process and understand pain. 

Dr. Jody said that this becomes even more complicated when we factor in memory and previous experiences—particularly when it comes to medical situations. For example, if children experience a traumatic situation with needles early on, that stays with them and affects the actual pain they feel in the future. 

Pain is a biological, psychological, and social experience. 

In fact, Dr. Jody said that early medical experiences can leave a lasting impact—even causing adults to refuse to go the doctor or even to treat symptoms of illnesses or injuries. 

And yet, on a societal level, we often dismiss fears or concerns that children have about pain, doctors, and needles. Doctors aren’t trained to see pain with nuance or a psychological lens. There is a perception that children should be forced to “get over it” because the pain itself isn’t that bad. 

But approaching pain with this concept ignores the psychological aspect of pain. The truth is that pain is complex—we don’t know what emotional aspects are at play that cause increased pain or deep fear for our children. Instead, we can learn how to navigate these fears in a different way and advocate for sensible pain management in the process. 

Myths About Kids and Pain Management

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Those of us with children who suffer from needle phobia know how intense their fears can be. And traditionally, we might think we only have two options—hold our children down and force them through shots and medical procedures, or forgo them and risk illness. 

But Dr. Jody said that there are different options—we just aren’t presented with them, largely because the medical community and society are holding onto old myths about children and pain. 

Children who fear pain from needles might be thought of as “dramatic,” or even “rebellious” later on. Dr. Jody said that it’s easy and common to stereotype resistance to doctors as bad behavior—but children’s experiences are real and deserve to be acknowledged. 

Children’s experiences are real and deserve to be acknowledged.

She pointed out that there’s an ongoing myth that early childhood pain doesn’t matter—that because children won’t remember these experiences, they aren’t a big deal. But the research doesn’t support this idea. Dr. Jody said the body remembers traumatic painful experiences even when the mind doesn’t. 

Another myth is that trauma is unavoidable during a medical procedure. This reinforces the false notion that it’s okay to hold kids down and force them to endure pain, often without any pain management. Dr. Jody said physical restraint is a recipe for trauma with long-term effects. 

There are ways to cushion the mental impact of painful procedures like shots and vaccines. Dr. Jody said that many medical professionals need to change their perspective on kids and pain management—medical procedures don’t have to be traumatic. 

How the Medical Community Views Pain in Women, Kids, and Minorities

The medical community has a history of overlooking pain and medically gaslighting minority groups and women, so it’s not a surprise that this trend applies to children as well. 

Some doctors might assume women are being overly dramatic and dismiss their pain. She pointed to IUDs as an example—for some women, insertion is extremely painful, but the CDC only recently put recommendations into place for pain management during the procedure. Medical bias causes doctors to overlook legitimate pain. 

This dismissal of pain is even more prevalent for moms of color. Dr. Jody said some in the medical community still assume that Black people are less sensitive to pain—a myth that persists from harmful messaging stemming from the slavery era. 

Medical myths and biases can influence how doctors perceive and treat pain. 

Medical myths and biases can influence how doctors perceive and treat pain in their patients of color. For example, research shows that Black moms are less likely to be prescribed pain medication during the postpartum period than white moms. 

Just like gender and racial bias, there is an underlying systemic bias impacting how doctors are handling pain management for kids—and moms aren’t being empowered to identify and address these biases. 

How to Make Vaccinations Less Traumatic for Kids

Shots can be a scary experience for many children—especially those who are neurodivergent or highly sensitive. But there are steps we can take to prepare and reduce the chance of traumatic experiences. 

Many moms don’t even realize they can advocate for a different approach to shots and medical treatment. We’re often wary of angering or insulting doctors—and we don’t want to be seen as overbearing or troublemaking moms. But Dr. Jody said that we can often approach pediatricians collaboratively, without confrontation. 

It’s okay to ask questions before any medical procedures—and to share helpful information with your pediatrician if you have any concerns. 

You can even enter your pediatrician’s email address on Meg Foundation’s website—they will then email them a list of evidence-based guidelines for best practices on administering vaccinations to children. 

When we avoid prepping our child, we deprive them of the chance to cope. 

Another way you can help prevent medical trauma is by preparing your child for what is going to happen. We might want to avoid this so that our children don’t build up

the fear and anxiety in advance—but Dr. Jody pointed out that when we avoid prepping our child, we deprive them of the chance to cope and figure out how to navigate the challenge at hand. 

She recommends being open and honest. For example, if our child asks if a shot is going to hurt, we might say that we don’t know whether it will or not. We can also emphasize the importance of the medication they’ll be receiving to help them understand why it has to happen. 

Dr. Jody also cautions against physically restraining your child. If it becomes clear that your child isn’t going to be able to stay still enough to safely receive a vaccination, or if you have any concerns about your pediatrician, it’s okay to walk away and try another day. 

Pain Management Options During Vaccinations

It’s also helpful to learn about different pain management options for kids during vaccinations. We might not even realize that we have ways to help manage pain during shots—but when we learn about available options, we can advocate for them.  

Numbing Creams

Topical numbing creams and patches, such as those with lidocaine, can help minimize discomfort. They are easy to apply, economical, and usually effective. 

Distractions

Distraction is one of the simplest but useful techniques for pain management. It’s human nature to not notice pain or worries when you’re focused on something else. Dr. Jody pointed out that screen time can help distract children during vaccinations—and even in the waiting room to reduce the build-up of fear and anxiety. 

Buzzy

Vibrating devices such as Buzzy are placed on the injection site for 30-60 seconds, then moved upward during the shot. The vibration essentially distracts the brain from pain. They are clinically proven to reduce pain during injection. 

Comfort Positioning

The way you hold your child can also reduce stress and create a calm environment that produces a less painful and more calm experience. Meg Foundation recommends specific comfort positioning to help ease discomfort. 

Prepping in Advance

Dr. Jody recommended showing your child different pain management options and practicing with them, letting them get involved in the decision. Role-playing a doctor’s visit and a shot can help ease discomfort for small children. Reassure them that you will be with them every step of the way. 

Checking on Your Own Anxiety

Needles and medical procedures aren’t just scary for our children—they’re also frightening for us. In fact, watching our children go through medical procedures or experience pain can cause trauma to parents as well. 

But it’s important to remember that we are a source of stress or calm for our child. They will respond to our own reactions. Staying calm and comforting can help create a better experience. 

Ultimately, remember that advocating for your child is not being overprotective—your child has a right to pain management options, and you have a right to push for them and educate pediatricians and doctors when necessary. 

If you are struggling with anxiety and need support, our mom therapists are here to help! Book a free 15 minute consult today. 

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